Now I Understand Where Atheists Come From

Today was the last time I will be seeing the camp until next year. While I enjoyed what I did, today's visit to the site was an exception.

Chris and Matthew have apparently been absolutely miserable the entire last week. I don't know whether this is a result of their father's brainwashing or what, but I think that the only one who will be coming back next year will be Ben.

This past week, the kids' sleepaway camp was putting together a show about the story of Esther. The director (named Nick, who is a cute chubby bear cub, and one of the men I was referring to in one of my earlier reports) introduced himself, and the members of the cast filed in.

I don't know who writes this contemporary Christian garbage. Their desperate attempts to make this play relevant to the kids of today failed miserably. It also didn't help much that we were sitting right by the drummer. There was about one boy for every nine girls, and only a few of them seemed to be interested in being there. If my gaydar is correct, the kid playing Esther's husband will soon have a boyfriend, and the talent pool for the boys was very limited, so they were forgetting their lines all over the place.

Playing "Spot the Homo in Church Camp" is a lot more fun than I thought it would be.

The girls were a little bit better about this, since they could get the more talented ones singing solo. But buried within a bunch of girls was some boy who decided that being in front of a bunch of parents and other campers was the perfect opportunity to repeatedly scratch his armpit and sniff his fingers.

This rivals Broadway for showbiz pizazz, no?

After their trumpet duet (of about eight notes), Chris and Matthew were relegated to the back of the chorus, where they looked like they would rather be anywhere else on Earth than in that group of people.

This show finally came to an end, and Chris and Matthew wanted nothing more than to go home, but Matthew wanted nothing to do with Sam.

Upon parting ways with the rest of the group, my aunt, uncle, and I went to a home improvement store (they are redoing their kitchen), then went home to do laundry.

While this was going on, I went over and said hi to my aunt's next-door neighbor Keith. He had a stroke a while back, and he is recovering. He asked me if I wanted to see a pretty girl, and he took me into his house and showed me his adorable step-granddaughter Sophia. She is about eighteen months old, and is an adorable blond moppet. He also introduced me to his wife, and he and I chatted a little bit on his back deck.

I had promised to take my aunt and uncle out for dinner tonight to thank them for their hospitality, so we went to a restaurant that was fairly new, fairly expensive, and well worth it. I try to be a good houseguest, but I am sure that my uncle wants his comics page without a ton of ink all over it, and I am also sure they are ready to have quieter dinners.

This also means that they have to do their own dishes. But they have to deal with that.

I can't believe how fast this week and a half has gone. I don't know how ready I am to go home, but it has to happen on Monday. So I have one more day to relax.

Eric Out.