It is very quiet at the moment. My aunt is getting her hair cut, and my uncle is mowing the lawn. I am taking this opportunity to catch up on this blog.
Yesterday was little Ben's fourth birthday, and one of my aunt's missions for the day was to go to Walmart to get a present for him. Sam, having finished his day at kindergarten, went with my aunt and me.
Somewhere along the line, my cousin BethAnne came up with the idea that if one child has a birthday, the other three should also each get a small present so they don't feel left out. This is especially a concern for Sam, since his birthday is in December, and the other three fall within an eighteen-day period about this time each year (8/23 through 9/9). I personally think this is a little nutty, but then so is BethAnne. Having four kids in this day and age is insane.
We were at Walmart, where my aunt picked out a couple of gifts for Ben. We then went to the Lego aisle, where Sam pointed out that he wanted a set costing $30. My aunt told him that he could have a set that was about $10, but he just kept wanting the bigger set. So my aunt made an ultimatum: he can have the smaller Lego set, or he leaves Walmart with nothing. He left with nothing, and kept up the tantrum the whole trip home.
BethAnne, being a pushover, would have given in, but my aunt did not. She felt bad about Sam not getting anything, but I am glad she didn't back down. In the interest of full disclosure, I will say that she got a Lego set for me as well. I did not push this on her (even planning to buy it for myself), but she got it for me anyway. It will keep me occupied when we go camping. And once I get home, it will be a welcome decorative addition to the Batcave. After all, every gay man in his late thirties needs a Spongebob bus, complete with Spongebob and Patrick figurines!
Sam has been a holy terror this entire visit. He is extremely loud and still doesn't speak properly, even though he is going to be turning six in three months. We are all wondering if he has a hearing problem, but he was so uncooperative when he was taken for a hearing test that they couldn't do said test.
Sam also has extreme separation anxiety. He started kindergarten this year, and getting him to go has been a challenge. Prior to this year, my aunt would take Chris and Matthew to school (dropping them off), but she was not about to park and walk Sam into the classroom each day. So my aunt now stays with Ben, and BethAnne does the honors. The fact that they don't take the bus to school is ridiculous, since they take it home. Going home, BethAnne won't even let Chris and Matthew walk the one block back to the house alone; she makes someone meet them at the bus. BethAnne is a little overprotective of the kids, and worries about them getting kidnapped. Trust me, anyone who kidnapped these kids would give them back within twenty minutes. I used to say an hour, but they have gotten so bratty over the years that the time a stranger would tolerate them has now diminished by two-thirds.
BethAnne and her 450-pound jackass absentee husband David still blame every single thing on Matthew, to the point that my aunt told me that he said that he can't wait to grow up and move to California, so he doesn't have to look at his family anymore. Kind of sad for a nine-year old to be so unhappy that he wants to cut ties with everyone. I do hope he keeps ties with my aunt, since she has been the best thing that has happened to him, and I also hope he will talk to me. I am not a perfect person by any means, but in dealing with these kids, I always have tried to be fair and listen. My aunt does this as well. BethAnne and David do not.
Continuing on with yesterday, we had a birthday party for Ben, which started at seven. I can't help but think that this party was more for the benefit of the adult guests than for Ben and the kids. The same thirteen people who were there for Easter dinner were there for this party: the nine of us, plus my uncle's aunt and uncle, my uncle's brother and his living-in-sin-for-thirty-years-and-why-don't-they-get-married-already girlfriend Rachel. Although people were gathered at seven, the gift opening and cake didn't start until after eight. The time before that was social hour for the adults to yap about the inanities and trivialities of their lives, which also left me excluded, since I am not from this area and no one wanted to hear me talk anyway.
I thought it was insane: there was a stack of gifts sitting on a side table, and two cakes were on the kitchen table, and a little boy who turned four (whose party this supposedly was) has been waiting all day for this, and he is kept waiting so that everyone can catch everyone else up on the idle small-town gossip. I wish that these people would have put themselves in the kids' shoes for a minute to see how this looked. Chris kept asking when they were going to have the cake and gifts, and I'm glad of this; I was in the same boat as they were, the only difference is that I know to keep my mouth shut and look pretty. It sounded more convincing coming from the eleven year old than the thirty-six year old anyway.
Eventually they got down to business of cake and ice cream, only Ben blew out the candles too soon, so BethAnne lit them and made him blow them out again for a photo. When he started unwrapping gifts before they got the camera out, I thought that BethAnne was going to demand that they be rewrapped for the benefit of the camera. And tell me: WHOSE party was this? He's FOUR freaking years old, for Pete's sake!!! Let the kid have his birthday!
Things wrapped up around 9:15. I was ready to go long before then, but since I had ridden in with my aunt and uncle (and walking home would not have gone over well), I sat there and waited. When we got back home, I went to the basement, got on the stationery bike, and pedaled the stress (and cake) off for half an hour. I went about seven miles. I hope it offset my eating.
Today I was up at about 7:15 or so, and went with BethAnne, my aunt, and Ben to a closeout grocery store. It is run by Mennonites. With a family of six, BethAnne uses places like this to make ends meet. Having drunk an awful lot of water, I needed to use the bathroom, and probably shouldn't have referred to the female employees as "bonnet ladies." What's done is done, though.
This pretty much brings me up to date. I had to stop writing this entry midway to have lunch, but I think I am now caught up.
Eric Out.
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