What A Week!

Coming back to work from vacation to a lot of drama is becoming a habit. So with the next two days off, I don't know what to think, since my day was ruined by someone exactly two minutes before I was supposed to leave. So I am wondering, of course, what will come to pass on Tuesday.

I am, frankly, kind of unhappy right now. It's not just a matter of stress at work, there is more:

First, leaving my family behind is never easy. Their "normal" life is my vacation life, and although there are aspects I don't always agree with, it is more home than anywhere else I know. And considering that the rest of my family life is splintering (still thinking about being slighted by Kyle and Kari about the miscarriage news), that is more or less the only family I have anymore.

Then, there is Justin. I never seem to see him anymore. He works all these insanely late shifts, and the best I can do is get an hour during his lunch break, since our days off never seem to mesh. We talk on the phone every day, but it isn't the same. 

Beth and I were supposed to get together tomorrow for her birthday, but once again, she has disappeared on me. I have a gift for her, and it is wrapped very nicely, and I want to be able to give it to her. I tried to call her today, leaving her a message. When I tried to call her back, it seemed like she answered the phone (I heard some background noise), but she didn't say anything. What's going on here?

I am still scared to step on the scale. I have eaten reasonably during the last four days (yesterday was about 1700 calories, today was about 1750 or so), but I don't know if I have undone the damage of my vacation. I know that I can eat more on vacation than I do at home and still be fine, but I am scared of losing my resolve. I just hope that since I ate one cookie each of the past two days, it will help keep me from going on a sweets binge. If I deprive myself of these things, once I get a cheat day, I really go overboard on the cookies, donuts, and other baked goods. On the plus side, I was very hungry this morning, and looking at myself, I don't think I look any fatter. Plus, my belt (which was getting a little bit tighter while I was on vacation) is no longer biting into my waist. So perhaps I am back on track.

Whenever I wind up composing an entry like this, I am usually listening to XM and doing laundry. Tonight is no exception. I am doing three loads out of four, and I have showered. So once I get my third load hung up, it will be time to head to bed. 

On Monday, when I was waiting for Justin, I passed the time by power walking at Springfield Mall. It is getting more and more depressing and creepy there with each visit since we spent our first date there. 

There used to be a second food court called "Food Fest", and it was pretty much abandoned when Justin and I were there for the first time. The only store that was still open was a game room. That has now closed down. So that entire part of the mall is empty, with everything except a vacant Italian restaurant covered in drywall. They have turned the climate-control system off in that wing. While I was walking through that part of the mall, I felt very unsafe, not to mention uncomfortable. I am guessing that the only reason it is not completely blocked is that there is a parking garage at the end of that part of the mall.

There is a section of the mall where the only store still operating is a nail salon, so they have closed that entire section by putting in a wall and creating one long, labyrinthine corridor to the nail salon. They got around to putting drywall over the now-closed Bennigan's, and two more stores have closed as well: a mom-and-pop store called "Cool Stuff" and the Cinnabon. 

When we were there a while ago, I jokingly referred to Springfield Mall as "Drywall City." This is true even more so now. I have a feeling it is a matter of time before the demolition begins.

I never went to Springfield Mall during my life. Once in a while we would go there, so if you are wondering why I am sentimental about it, there were some good times that I remember there:

• Right after I graduated from high school in 1990, I spent the entire day there, seeing two movies, and just hanging out. For someone with no friends and no real life, it was great.
• On October 13, 2006, Beth and I went all over creation, and one of the places we went to was Springfield Mall. She shot video footage of me on an exercise machine at the Brookstone there (now gone), and we had a root beer float at the A & W (also gone).
• My first date with Justin. Like I have said before, if you can spend more than four hours browsing around a dying shopping mall with someone you hardly know and you still want to spend time with him, you know something is right.

But we can't stand in the way of progress, can we? That mall is now an artifact, and it needs to be put out of its misery. We will see what happens.

And if you wondered why I suddenly changed topics midway through this post, I was having some trouble yesterday with the autosave, so I couldn't post anything, even though I was inspired to do so.

Eric Out.