Are We Human, Or Are We Dancer?

I am really liking the new song by the Killers, "Human." Unfortunately, the only copy of the video is provided directly by the record label, and they don't allow the video to be embedded. Here is a substitute:

There is a slight degree of separation between this and the Killers' song. The Human League did a song called "Human" as well. I like this song better. It is another of those songs that takes me back to my Semester of Bliss, in the fall of 1990. I think I should grow my hair and style it like Philip Oakey does here.


But anyway, on with this entry. I am currently extremely tired. As stated in my last entry, I worked the late shift on Thursday, and was back at work at 10:30 the next morning. Naturally, I woke up at about 5:30 in the morning, and could not get back to sleep. So I just got up and got myself walking.


At seven, I was done, and I went and got a salad at McDonald's for dinner. Since I was going to Freddie's, I feel like a cheapskate just sitting there and taking up a table without eating. This was why I had the salad, and went out with 1085 calories consumed.


Unfortunately, nothing on Freddie's menu exactly qualifies as diet food. I looked at the appetizer menu, and the only thing that I felt that would do minimal damage was the bruschetta. Justin had fried pickles. For the most part, the waitstaff at Freddie's is very friendly, but our waitress has always been a nightmare. She looks at us and knows that since we don't order alcohol, she cold-shoulders us. I was ready to leave by 9:45, but I was there until ten getting the check paid.


Since it was Friday, there was karaoke, and I sang the old Backstreet Boys hit "Larger Than Life." Justin sang "The Dance" (big surprise there!). I don't really like going out if I have to work the day after, but after lamenting that I never get to see him, it would be stupid to turn him down.


Much to my stupidity, that is what I did last night. He wants to go see a production of "The Wizard of Oz" and a performance of the Gay Men's Chorus. I turned him down flat for "Oz" and told him that I didn't know about the chorus. I explained that it was more a matter of money than anything else, but I do worry that if I keep turning him down he will find someone more interesting. I just hope that seeing him twice this past week (when I had to work the next day on both days), and enduring "Beverly Hills Chihuahua" will count for something. But I emailed him and said that if my schedule works out, it might be fun.


Even after nine months, I am still so insecure about this relationship. Heaven knows why.


I am very proud of myself for salvaging my day as far as eating is concerned. I made the mistake of having a cookie at lunch. This set me off, but I was able to salvage it by eating yet another salad at McDonald's, and instead of going to Target for popcorn, I had a 100-calorie bag at home. And since I have brushed my teeth, I am done eating for the day, finishing at 1700 or so calories. I have not been sitting around with my thumb up my butt tonight, either, I have done laundry and plowed through a pile of dirty dishes that Cleo and Julie were nice enough to leave me. Tova once said that Julie would dirty every pot, pan, and dish in the entire kitchen to make toast. I'd be inclined to agree with this assessment.


Tomorrow I have to go to a dinner with my department. I really don't want to, but I have to go to save face. We are going to Maggiano's Little Italy, which is more temptation. I hope that if I decide to eat very little, my co-workers will understand. But the last group of people I want to spend time with on my days off is my workmates. But I said I would be there, so it will be.


My last load of wash is now in the dryer. I am sitting here wearing an apron (which I put on to do the dishes), and nothing else. I am ready to take a shower and go to bed.


Eric Out.